Dong Rabies

I haven't posted anything in a while, so here's an old Omegle log of mine.

You: sup
Stranger: hullo
You: yep
You: this is stimulating so far
You: i mean i didnt expect anything
Stranger: i think it's fantastic
You: oh yeah
You: well damn
Stranger: i'm so extremely excited by this
Stranger: woah i'm getting an erection
Stranger: that's normal right?
You: just keep your excitement in your pants bro
You: i know its tempting
You: but you have to collar that shit like a rotweiler
Stranger: well i already have a collar on it
You: otherwise it sprays foam everywhere
Stranger: i think that's why i got an erection
You: bites everyone
You: they get the rabies
You: no one wants dong rabies
Stranger: i want dong rabies
You: uh oh
You: thats a sign that you might have dong rabies
Stranger: OH NO
Stranger: oh wait
Stranger: OH YES!
You: you might need an innoculation to keep that under control
You: when you can control it
You: man
You: shits so tight even mj wouldnt wear it
You: disease at your command
You: suddenly armies fall
You: victims of their own dongs
You: and you just stride up like it aint no thing
You: take over the country
Stranger: a country of dong rabies people?
You: all because you collared and shot your crotch
You: yeah
You: but you get all the natural resources
You: ready to send the rabies people to fight other countries
You: i dunno man just consider it k
--LONG PAUSE--
You: oh fuck
You: you lost control didnt you
You: no way a pause this long is innocent
You: devoured by your junk
You: what a way to go
You: i now say a prayer for you bro
You: a prayer to go
You: ebb, rhyme and flow
You: as i stand over your grave in the falling snow
Stranger: my dong just dove down my throat and tried to choke me!
Stranger: help!
You: oh fuck
You: thats serious
You: punch the thing
You: show it whos boss
Stranger: i did a lil
You: you own the dong
Stranger: but it just got stronger
You: it does not own you
You: fuck its a kinky one
You: those are hard to kill
You: quick think of rosie o'donell in a two piece swimsuit
Stranger: wow
Stranger: thanks man
Stranger: it just flopped over
You: its an emergency break glass thing
Stranger: it's hanging there like a huge noodle
You: roll it up and get it examined by a dong vet
You: itll be up and chasing tail in no time
Stranger: okay is there any thing i should do to restrain it?
You: temporary use of a chastity belt might work
You: depends on how big it is
You: might just want a condom
Stranger: well my dong rabies has made it three feet long
You: i think extra large in some brands might stretch that far
You: theres always garbage bags
Stranger: okay good idea
You: + duct tape
You: duct tape fixes everything that shit is amazing
Stranger: YES PERFECT
You: now just contact your local doctor or vet
You: in a pinch fish & wildlife will work
You: theyll fix you up nice
Stranger: okay well i better go do that
You: k
You: good luck bro
Stranger: okay thank you master
You have disconnected.